Rants

Warning : The post that u're about to read are just rants and babbles... So, if u dun feel like reading, uhmm.. Dun read... Btw, it's my first rant here... I think...

I think today is 1 of the worst days I've actually experienced... EVER... Today I got up late for church... Then at badminton today, I lost like 4 games but won once but I totally felt defeated... Compared to last week which I lost 4 games straight, I felt happier then... Then come back, dinner was uhmm... pretty cold... After that, dad says wanna see the 3 of us... He tells us he's starting work tmw and ask us wat we're doing for this coming week... My sis says "school", brother says "holidays" and when it's my turn, I said "I got to go for my christmas play practice" and he was already shaking his head... He totally didn't support at all... Totally discouraging...

Do u know how that feels like?

Instead of saying "Wah, just masuk MMU for 1 sem, already got a part ar? Syabas..." he says "U're spending too much time with the Christian... Fellowship...."

Do u know how that feels?

Then he continues "U're in MMU to study... Not to spend time with the drama and play... U can go for their meetings but not for the play... Can withdraw?" So, I said "No" sternly... I mean, come on... It's my first time getting to do something important in MMU and I'm supposed to say "I can't do it"? Totally discouraging...

Do u know how that feels like?

I even thought of asking for his permission to join the Cell Group Meetings but it seems like, it's going down the drain... And talk but joining the Bible Study on Fridays?

Then after that, he continues "So, wat about the Gospel Chapel?" I was like "!!!!!!!!!!!". He said Gospel Chapel instead of church... He referred the church that we go to as "Gospel Chapel". Do your father who goes to the same church as u, refer that place by "Gospel Chapel"? I mean, he was the 1 who brought me there and how glad am I that he did... Can u imagine wat will happen if he didn't bring me to church when I was younger? I wouldn't to get to know so many awesome ppl... Really, i do mean it... U guys over there are really an awesome family... Currently, it felt more like home... Than the "home" I'm currently at... Back to the topic, he totally referred our church as "Gospel Chapel". Probably, u're thinking "uhmm... It's just a name..." but to me, it actually means alot... The question is "Do ur father call the place that u go to every Sunday, sometimes with him, as a name? or a church?"

I don't know... To me, it just doesn't seem rite...

Then he told me something which is even more painful... "If u're involve with the CF in MMU, dun get involve in Gospel Chapel... With their play and drama and those stuff..."

That felt like something really sharp being pierced.. It's not a methapor... I felt that at that moment... It's like saying "You can't go home..."

Haizzz... Today, It just doesn't seem right...



A song from the christmas play... It's pretty nice...